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March 15, 2005

A conversation with my blog

Hey blog, what's up.
Oh, hey Will, not much. It's been a while.
I know, I know. But listen, I update you more than some people.
Yeah but I've seen people who update like everyday.
But remember I updated you twice in one day that one time.
With links, Will. With links.
All right. So what's been going on, people reading you?
A couple people, I guess. I think it's mostly just search engines crawling me.
Yeah.
So you going to update me or what?
Yeah, eventually. I don't have much to say.
What about that ways to tell movies are bad stuff, you said you had more of those.
Yeah, they aren't as good as the first couple though.
Just talk about your life.
That's boring. It's boring enough I have to live it, I can't write about it too.
I see.
What about the rss feed, are people subscribing to that?
Yeah, there's like five people. Did you just link to an old post?
Yeah, so what?
So that's what you call updating me now, just linking to old posts?
Look, lay off all right? Blogs are stupid anyway.
So now I'm stupid.
No, not you. I mean other ones. You know, ones that aren't really about anything.
What am I about again?
Forget it.
Come on, you've got something to talk about. You get laid recently?
Man, my parents read this.
So what?
So let's just talk about something else.
All right, how's work?
Work's work.
I figured you'd say something like that. You're going to have to update me sooner or later.
Says who? I have no reason to. You give me nothing, blog. You are pointless. I thought you'd be fun, but you're not. No one cares about you, I don't care about you. I have enough unsatisfying hobbies, I don't need you on top of them. I could never update you again and it wouldn't affect anything in any way.
Just update me, man.
No.
Too late! Post number 36! Boo-yeah!
Aw, blog, you got me again, ha ha!
Yeah, did you see it coming?
No, you really got me.
Ha. Cool, cool. So what are you going to post about tomorrow?
Fuck you, blog.

Posted by Will at March 15, 2005 10:47 PM

Comments

I've had the exact same conversation with my blog...

Posted by: Alison at March 23, 2005 8:08 PM